Spiritual getaway

This past Friday I went with my dear friend Sheila to Eureka Springs, in the Ozark mountains for a personal spiritual retreat. I have lot to share about this journey!

I feel like I must have stepped in another land, perhaps a story land, where I gazed at beautiful bright leave colors, the hue of crimson and gold, mixed with green, and majestic hills and mountains stretching out, touched by golden sun rays and reflecting a marvelous cloudless blue sky. Since I have come back it has started to rain and get colder, the sky has been gray, so I truly do feel like I was in another world.

My time away was meant to be a time devoted to God. I wasn't always faithful in my mind but God truly did meat me where I was . I learned more things about myself, but I have also learned a lot about God and who He is through the lives of the people who touched me, through their spiritual surrender and devotion to the Lord. Saturday was spent being blessed and guided by the kindness and godliness of a wonderful Christian couple through their ministering and mentoring at their home and retreat center, a refuge for people who are seeking to grow in Christ and to find renewed strength in their spiritual journey. This place is Christview and I was so blessed by the beautiful setting and the fellowship I had there over a cup of tea, bread and a bowl of soup. I would recommend this kind of individual retreat (they do offer it for groups as well, and have their own retreats scheduled on their website), to anyone who wishes to find some quite time for reflection and prayer. Judy helped us through some guided prayer exercises and meditations on God's word. After my own solo time she also helped me with some sound spiritual direction, not providing answers for my every problem, but helping me discern and realize all the possible reasons I may struggle or feel someway. After our meal and sharing time at lunch Mr. John was kind to answer some questions of mine about in-depth bible study, particularly word study, and show me some study material that could be useful to me. All in all I was thoroughly encouraged and inspired to deeper prayer and meditation, studying God's Word, and to press closer to Him and not give up in my journey.

Even Sheila, my friend, blessed me with her own insights. I never cease to learn from her and to be blessed by her own approach to life and her beautiful spirit has inspired me over and over again. I was able to hang out with her in Eureka Springs and enjoy the sights and views from town.

Sunday was another full day of blessings and spiritual insights for we got to worship with the community of Little Portion. We had already been blessed by this community for we spent our two nights in their guest house out in the countryside at the Little Portion Retreat Center. This community stems from a Franciscan order that began in Indiana. It is a community made up by both single, celibate, and families who live together in the hermitage, where they grow their own food and raise animals. They interact with other people at large, who are welcomed at their guest center and sanctuary, which is simple and rustic, plain and beautiful like they believe their lives ought to be. They live in simplicity and poverty, not owning much, dedicating their entire lives to service to the Lord. I was blessed by their beautiful singing and their devotion during the worship service, which was centered around the sacrament of the Eucharist. After the service a sister of the community took us around on tour. If their had been more time and I knew I wasn't keeping her from lunch (the communal meal they have all together everyday), I think I would have asked her and many others there, specifically the families with young children, how did you end up here? How did you come to dedicate your life to this community, to change your lifestyle so radically? Actually the sister (they are known as the Brothers and Sisters of Charity) told me that you can be a domestic member, and I believe that you live out the calling in your own home place, not in the community in Eureka, and they have several domestic members all around the world, who contribute to both the community at Little Portion and to their missions. John Michael Talbot is the spiritual leader of this community; I didn't get to meet him for he was gone this Sunday but I was able to take back a couple of his instrumental tapes, for he is a world-renowned recording artist and his music is peaceful and calming, just like I believe I would experience my life to be at the hermitage and how I did experience my life this past weekend.
My hope and my desire now is to make it so everyday. But I struggle with the how-to and what to do about all the stuff my everyday life is made of?
I don't want to continue the turmoil of anxieties and worries I seem to feast on everyday in my real life. I want my routine to be simple and peaceful, my mind to feast on God's presence and the grace of the moment.

It might seem easy to live focusing only on God when I am not in my home, doing the chores, making phone calls, making sure everything is going smoothly, not forgetting something to do, someone to contact....it gets so hectic in so little time and I have already experienced the feeling of "Help! Take me off this roller coaster! I cant' get everything done it time!!" several times since I've been back.

Yet I won't experience a time of 'non-business' or restfulness unless I choose to relinquish my control of my life and my schedule. I have to choose peace and quiet within, giving my mind and heart to Christ, and allowing Him to whisper "Peace! Be still" to my monkey mind (thank you Sheila for the term!) and the noise that confuses me from inside. I will have peace, now. I will have rest, even now in the midst of house chores and toddler play and mess. I will have peace in the midst of business , friends and family to call on, to talk to, to connect with. I will have rest with my schedule packed with place to go, errands to run, projects to commence and finish and send off. I will have stillness in my heart and mind when I surrender everything, all my worries, insecurities and fears to Him. When I don't allow my mind to run with my anxieties, but quietly turn my heart to prayer.