Sometimes you never know what you will find in an old magazine.

I happened to chance on some new year's resolutions of the staff of a magazine that I believe is no longer in print. One of the writers of this magazine wrote her new year's resolution like this:

"I resolve to indulge in my favorite things. I'll drink more coffee and eat more sweets. I'll have more fun, and be more fun. I'll gorge on friendly conversation and find creative ways to minister. My house will stay tumbled (so you'll feel comfortable dropping by) and I'll dress down, not up. I'll also wear less makeup. I'll thank God every day for my husband's laugh lines. I'll play and learn and smile more often."

Wow. What a, pardon the cliche', breath of fresh air.
Do you remember my new year's resolution from last year? Well...don't go back to read it. You can all imagine what it was: I will lose weight, read my Bible and pray more, finish my projects, do better, be more discipline, blah blah blah....Don't get me wrong. These are not bad things. I do want to exercise more, be healthy spiritually, mentally, emotionally. But is this the way to go all the time? And shouldn't just be a part of our everyday life? What is more important? When I go to Heaven, will God ask me how many chapters and verses I read per day? How does my spiritual bank look like? In fact, how do you tell when someone is 'spiritual'? Is the number of devotionals and bible readings he does per day? How about a healthy person? Is it how she looks on the outside?

Ok...so yes, I do want to look good, better, I want to feel good. I want it to be a good year for me and those around me and who I love. And a part of feeling good, is doing things that bring you joy. And that in turn can ripple over to others. Stop trying to live a better life and just living life as it comes.

So here is my new year's resolution:

I will read more, and I will read books I want to read, any kind. I may or may not finish them. I won't give myself a limit.
I will eat a dark chocolate.
I will drink tea and coffee.
I will communicate with friends worldwide on the internet and through the lost art of letter writing.

I will write more. And I won't care how much I write, how long and how repetitive it might sound.

I will believe in myself. I will seize the day. I will have confidence that I can do what I really want to do.

I won't worry about learning and doing this that I don't' care about just because that is what everyone else is doing.

I will listen to Italian music and read Italian books, and dream about my home country. I will talk with others, my son and husband, in Italian. I will also speak French with those who can.
But I wont' worry if I don't do it as much as I wish.

I will dress as I like. Neat and Informal and comfortable, no makeup or jewelry except my wedding band. Except if I want to. I won't worry about how I look. I will find ethnic clothes to wear for fun and think of God's great big world and how wonderfully diverse it is.

I will walk or dance for the fun of it! I will have dates with friends and my sister. I will travel and take opportunities to go down the unbeaten path.

I will laugh and have fun. I wont' be serious all the time. I will look through the eyes of my son.

Most of all, I want to be myself this year. And to do that I need to learn to accept myself and not be afraid of what others think or say.

So this year, my one and only true resolution is to be more accepting and graceful beginning with myself, and with the gifts, passions, ideas and dreams I was given. And for some reason, I think this is the only resolution I'll need and the one that will yield the most results for a full and fruitful life.

My Christmas gift!

I got a laptop! I am so so happy, now I can go and use internet and keep up with all my friends and update everyone else through cyber world (and look up recipes, tips, music, news, and books, books and more books!!!)
I am so excited about my own laptop. My sil got me a gift certificate to a local coffee shop, so I am set now :) I enjoy so much writing and reading and the internet offers ways to do that in real time and share it with everyone else, especially my loved ones an ocean away and more! I also am so thankful to my hubby, who purchased this nice used laptop (a good way to save money and be green!) and uploaded all kinds of nice programs, like picasa from google, open office (a free program that works like word), mozilla firefox (our favorite internet software)...and much more (I have all our pictures, and he also bookmarked my favorite websites, like amazon and NPR). And now one big more challenge I am ready to head on: we had bought a personal finance program, (Money 2007) and I am ready to take care of our finances and budget. I am the biggest spender (but not the way you think! Jon spends the largest sum on one thing, I spend smaller amounts on groceries, things for the house, for Jman, etc!!! LOL...okay, and on occasional coffees and cutsie stuff.)


I am thinking of giving a new look to my blog. I should be able to give it a nice 'face lift' to celebrate this new calendar year, with some expert help from computer savvy dh who is at home this week (yuppie! family time!...btw, dh did GREAT this past semester. It was very hard intense work, but it paid off, I am so PROUD of him!)

So thank you to my best friend and husband (and to my folks and grandparents who pitched in)! Now he won't have to hear me say "Honey, can I borrow your laptop?"

Christmas Prayer

Peace on earth and goodwill to everyone!

I had the pleasure to go to a Christmas eve service at the local episcopal church yesterday. I enjoyed singing the old Christmas carols, beautiful old hymns, which sung in a small sanctuary with a high ceiling that echoes the tunes is something to always be enjoyed and savored. The little place was packed and dh and I got to attend along with my precious friend K. who was in town and her mother. Several scriptures were read and we joined in the chorus of Amen, Peace be with you and Hear Our Christmas Prayer. There is something in the repetition, in the kneeling and standing, in the readings that engages not only my mind but it does indeed engage my heart and my senses. And I love the way their prayers, simple and beautiful prose, seem to encompass all that we truly should be about and stand for:

"Oh Lord, we pray for the needs of your whole world, for peace and justice on earth, for the mission and unity of the Church for which your Son gave his life. (...) O Lord, because you particularly love them, we remember in your Name the poor and helpless, the cold, the hungry, and the oppressed, the sick and those who mourn, the lonely and unloved, the aged, and little children, as well as all those who do not know and love the Lord Jesus Christ."

We took communion (which is always the highlight of the services generally) and at the end we prayed this prayer:

"Grant, we beseech you, Almighty God, that the words which we have heard this night with our out-ward ears, May, through your Grace, be so grafted in our hearts, that they may bring forth in us the fruit of good living to the honor and praise of your Name, through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen."

Tidings of Comfort and Joy to you! May peace reign in your hearts!
Merry Christmas!

Taking Care of God's Green Earth

So last night dh and I finally saw An Inconvenient Truth.

One note: I know some are not fans of Al Gore. I won't discuss politics here. I am pretty neutral right now, but I did realize that the documentary was pretty politicized, since I guess, it was his movie.
I have also heard bad rep on him, as in that he has a huge house, that consumes more than four middle class homes together, something like that...let me just say this: that is really sad if it is the truth, and it is a shame, but we know there will be hypocrites. For example: that the church has a bunch of phonies is old news...but that does not diminish the truth about Jesus Christ.


That there are hypocritical politicians...that is definitely everyday news....but that we are excessive greedy people...that is still sadly the truth.

Since I was young, I remember talking about pollution, and its effects on nature, on ourselves, on our health. On our quality of life. Especially on our future. That pollution is bad, is a problem for the earth and for all humans has been know for decades. What have we done? It seems not much. Because it takes everyone to take action and to make changes.

Now that I have a child, for some reason, I feel even more strongly about taking care of the earth I live in. This home away from home. What legacy will I leave?

I think that for us modern rich westerners of the 21st century it is truly an 'inconvenient truth'...and I won't shy away from saying it is for all the business that make money off of unsustainable and polluting industries and technologies.

The equation is this: old habits x new technologies = unexpected and devastating consequences. In everyday popular media literature you will read all sorts of reviews about what is going on with climate change and other environmental concerns. But not so from scholarly journals, the ones that are reviewed by scientist and experts from all positions in life. Is there a change? Well...JRR Tolkien already realize that there was last century when he wronte The Lord of the Rings Trilogy! I might not sense it b/c I was born way past the industrial revolution (as all of us who are reading this of course)...and that is why it is inconvinient in so many ways. We need to learn ways that were not taught to us, we need to learn new healthier and moral habits about recycling, reusing, or just plain stop using. We need to change our patterns, and stop wasting, wasting, wasting our resources. We have so much, too much....cutting back wont' take away what we love, what we live for. I believe it will give back much much more. It will give back life, life for us, for the future generations, for the millions of people who are hurting because of our waste.

Mr. Gore, for all his faults, talks about morality, how it is an ethical, moral issue, this global warming, this pollution we are creating. What I have never understood is why Christians might think that this isnt' a moral issue, that it doesn't affect our lives as Christians. If we are hurting the earth, who are we hurting if not earthlings? Could we be hurting the heart, grieving the Spirit of God too? He created us, created the world....the heavens and the earth...

And it was good. Are we treating it as something good? Or are we taking so much advantage of it, just to profit, just to use and throw away?

There is nothing unChristian about it. I just wish we would take a greater stand. I am going to. Not because it is the cool thing to do. Because it is the right thing to do.

Here is one thing I have stop doing: using plastic bags at the grocery store, but bringing my own, and not using plastic bottles (or reusing the ones I have). Plastic is one of the most toxic waste we have, for it takes a very long time to disintegrate, and as it does it lets out a lot of bad chemicals.

Promises

As promised...I am going to write a little about Promises, the documentary movie made a few years ago about the war between Palestine and Israel...the conflict and the hatred, from the viewpoint of the children. This is not a exhaustive explanation of what is going on, why it is going on, for how long, how it has evolved, the issues, the problems, the treatise, politic games, etc. For that...there is the library (or the internet, though for a better understanding you should probably read something more historical and objective...something I have to do).

You learn so much more from children. They were just children...normal, transparent, played volleyball or ran, got upset if they didn't win, loved to tease, be silly, were curious, were shy, rode their bike...yet, they were different from children that are usually around me. They hated, perhaps even if not sure why, they hated those who were from the other side: Palestinian vs. Israelite. Perhaps hate is too strong a word, because honestly they didn't hate each other, they were mostly eager and curious to talk to one another...they hated the conflict, the war, the Palestinians felt like they had been kicked out, turned away from what they considered their very home, their own holy land. And of course the Israelites saw them as infidels, who had taken their promise land. I don't' know much about the promises for the Muslims from the Koran or Islamic tradition, but for the Palestinians, Jerusalem, that land is also promised to them. Promises, promises...

Some people have very strong opinions about this huge conflict, a conflict that as a white European descendant touches me very very little honestly. However, when I moved to the US I was startled a little to the one sided feeling I got here. I guess it is b/c of the history the US government has had with the founding of the new nation of Israel. And I honestly know very little about it so I won't discuss it until I at least further my knowledge on the subject.

But back to the children. The children are real. And the children are dealing with the grown-up world of constant attacks, violent revolts, military occupation, military protection, bombs, social restrictions and constraints....something I have never ever experienced, so even writing about it really doesn't sum up what they go through.

We get to see the world from the perspectives of both Israeli and Palestinian children. Some things they say are very strong, some things they say...or better, the questions they ask and the thoughts they come up with...are very hopeful I would say, because they show flexibility, they show readiness to move on.

Children are the future. Could we help these two countries, these two people, find some peace? some healing?


Here are the stars: Farai, Sanabel, Yako and Daniel, Moishe, Rachel, Malmoud, Shlomo, Ahmed and Motassim....who is who? They are all children, yet they live such different lives, just a few miles from each other.

The last words of Farai...crying, after meeting, playing soccer with, having fun being silly, being kids, with some Israeli kids (the only ones who wanted to and were allowed by parents-- watch that part of the doc!) who ventured for the first time (in history perhaps!) in a Palestinian camp, were these:

"All this will be in vain"

It broke my heart and I cried too. These children (now young adults...we saw some after videos..the documentary was nominated that year for the Oscars...they didnt' win:( ), these flesh and blood little people DO NOT WANT WAR...they don't' want to live with this conflict, this fear, to not be able to interact, to go into town, into the capital, to worry about the bus going to school blowing up, their friends, family, mother, father and sister and brother dying, being thrown into jail. But they are, they have...and they still deal with these things. They are everyday occurrences for them.

Peace is the hardest thing to win. But is it worth it? We don't know, because we are living it now and we take it for granted. Our freedoms. And the respect of freedom we have for each other (most times).

Farai now lives in the states. He is a refugee and he is getting (probably already has) his naturalization. He works (worked?) at Wal-Mart and was wanting to go to college.

He misses his family, but that is not were he wants to live. He doesn't' want the hate, the terror, or the factions.

For some reason I can't help but think of Romeo and Juliet...both of the same country, torn between power? between pride?


The cutest part of the movie was Rachel...it is closer in the beginning. Rachel is an Israeli girl and she is telling the cameraman what she will do when she is older, getting ready for the Sabbath with her family. And during the whole time she is trying hard to get some chairs that are topped on each other, unstuck...it takes about 8 minutes or so. It is so adorable.

Some of them have changed their views growing older. Most of them still don't like the other, of course...The worst part is that they are more like the adults now: they don't' have much hope for things to change. Main reason is that it is really hard to know what to do.

Peace. The hardest thing to win.

A friend in need: another Turners Syndrome baby girl

One a more trite note...I am sending this news out because I know many of you will pray and think about my friend A. She is a member of Hannah's Prayer, the support group I have been a part of since Gioia's loss. She just found out, after years of struggling with infertility and early miscarriages, that her unborn baby of 11 weeks has Turners Syndrome, the same condition our Gioia had. Please keep her and her husband in your thoughts and prayers. They have decided to continue the pregnancy, which I know as hard it will be it will be a blessing in the end. These 'imperfect' jewels are still a treasure for us, no matter how short and how deformed they might be. They struggle with the 'quality of life' issue that others have brought up (Drs., family), and I pray that all our minds and hearts will be open to reconsider that term, something we impose and not something that is necessary true for the children, and shouldn't be for us adults.

Just pray that they will have the support and the strenght...it is a hard journey, a hard path to walk, a path with so many unkwons and so much heartache....I pray we can hold them up and carry that pain.

Thanks.

Because of Heaven,
Miriam

Just a quick update!

So sorry I have been gone. I have missed catching up on all my blogger friends as well. I am missing my internet connection. Can't say I have done much better without it... still unsure where I left my brain at most times, LOL!
I had told my SIL, El, that I would write a post about the great documentary we watched over the Thanksgiving holiday. WE got to visit her and brother Josh (dh's) over a week ago. What a great time! We miss you guys. We went to their new home in northern Colorado...and we are scoping out the place for ourselves. So I will have to share picts and more about our trip out there. J-man did great, which really suprise us since we didn't have the modern entertainment equipment....car DVD player! I just wanted to let you know I am still alive and well...I am hoping to get through one more week of strict diet (yes, self imposed of course, but I am tired of the extra lbs-- 15 to be exact, and I thought what better and worse time than before the holidays. It is teaching my discipline guys!! haha...I know, but pls give support and cheer me, ok?? I miss my lattes and chocolate and peanut butter and toast...but they will come back IN MODERATION...grrrr).

Okay, so enough about me. Oh wait this blog is about me...!!! I am being silly because it is late and I need to go eat my low cal fudgesicle before bed. To cheer me up.

I love all of you, and soon dh and sister will be out of school and I know they said, PROMISED they would let me get out of the house and use the internet and I WILL POST THEN!! (that is in two more weeks, btw).

I will try and catch up with all your news then too.

Later!