Next week is Lent

I haven't grown up following any kind of church traditions, or a liturgical calendar (I think I was in my early 20s when I learned what liturgical meant!). Thanks to some friends (you know who you are!) and other experiences in my life I have come to sort of desire more ritual and a way to weave a tangible theme of faith in my everyday life. Now, I know there is more to this expression of faith, but as a very scatterbrained and disciplined-challenged person in general, I look at this expression of faith as a way of making it real without faking it, or without making myself fake feelings of thoughts I do not yet possess...but at the same time creating an atmosphere for growth and to express feelings and thoughts I pray and hope to have. I hope this made sense.

Anyhoot...Lent is next week. Ash Wednesday (and I do not know yet why it is called such) is next week. And I have decided to (drum roll please) ...... give up sweets. Yes, the nice sugary thing, especially the one entrenched in a dark brown coating or dripping with velvety smooth chocolate. And that is because I want, I pray to want even more, that every word of God be "sweeter than chocolate" (instead of honey) to me. That is my prayer. My prayer is simply this: Lord, please be real and close to me. I need to know you more.

I want to desire you more. More than chocolate!

Okay, battery is running out!
Sometimes techonology is unforgiving.

I will write more about it especially for the weeks to come!

Making peace with spiders

Last week I watched on my own, while J-man was down for his nap, the movie that was released last year I believe, based on E.B. White's novel: Charlotte's Web.

I cried! The tears were just streaming down my face without me realizing it. I got to read that book. I have forgotten that part of my childhood. I think this book is definitely meant not for children but most especially for grumpy and negative adults like I have been tending to be too often!

I think my mother might have read this book to me as a child, or perhaps she read part of it? Whichever the case I do know that when I was young and I, who have a tendency to dislike and even fear spiders, no matter how small and innocuous, crying out for her to "DO SOMETHING THERE IS A SPIDER!!!" and asking her to mercilessly kill it and take it away from my sight, she would just look at me with calm and determinations and say "Oh, let's not kill the spider...it might be Charlotte!"

And that will always make me stop and think...what a silly mother I have!!

But now, it is such a beautiful silly and fun memory of my mom. Though no spiders have come my way I hope to be able to say "Shalom to you, creepy crawly friend" and not think anything about it...Unless it is more CREEPY than friendly looking...I am going to have to work on this still guys..

Charlotte, I am so sorry. Please forgive me!

(very grateful indeed that no eight legged creature has come my way yet, especially after the episode my sister-in-law went through...being bit by a spider in HER own bed. And btw, Elle, when I was staying at your place for Thanksgiving, and you guys let us sleep in your bed...I had Jon check underneath the covers a couple of times!!!)